Saturday, October 11, 2014

40 Before 40 Check-up

Twenty days to my birthday and it is time to check in on my list-o-goals
  1. Travel to the Big Island-    We bought our tickets and made our reservations! We will be going for Christmas! I am so excited. 
  2. Hike to Laie Summit  I will be completing this on NOV 1st. Yep, going up the Hill on the morning of my 40th birthday. A few friends who are interested in the trek will be going with me. It will be an 8 hour hike.
  3. Hike Stairway to Heaven--This trail has been closed and monitored closely. I won't likely complete this goal.  There's always next year.
  4. Hike Sacred Falls--Another illegal hike that I cannot accomplish . . .yet.
  5. Hike Makapu'u
  6. Hike Diamond Head--I might be able to do this next Friday, stay tuned and cross your fingers.
  7. Complete a Marathon distance--This is on the calendar for December. I will be running the Laie Marathon on the second Saturday of December with a group of friends. It goes from Laie to Waimea and back again.  Should take me about 5 hours. Yikes.
  8. Complete a sprint Triathalon
  9. Learn to cross walk my surfboard--I'm not super awesome but I'm doing better and practice a lot.
  10. Learn to ride a skate board--after spending an hour or so messing around with the skateboard I decided that that was enough. The kids think I'm cool without being a good skateboarder :-)
  11. Ride my bike with no hands--I can kinda do this. for like 5 seconds. I'll continue working on this this next year because I will begin training for an Oregon Coast bike trip that Dave and I will be doing next summer.
  12. Be in a flash mob
  13. Make home made yogurt
  14. Make home made caramels--this is on the calendar for next Sunday afternoon
  15. Make Granola Bars
  16. Make Gyros--Will be making these next week (waiting on the recipe from my SIL)
  17. Make CocoPuffs (like Liliha bakery)--I'm gonna do it today!!!!
  18. Make authentic Pani Popo
  19. Get or make a dress form
  20. Sew a Hawaiian Quilt block
  21. Learn to tat
  22. Sew Easter Dresses for/with my girls
  23. Sew/Tailor a suit for one of the boys--Still haven't gotten around to this and won't before my birthday. Dang. I will do it still.
  24. Sew myself a blouse--it is in the works. I've got the material and the pattern and now I just gotta make the time. Next Saturday I think is the day.
  25. Sew myself a dress
  26. Make curtains for the house Ok, so I didn't "make" them. My landlord gave me the curtains I needed so why make more?!
  27. Learn how to use the embroidery machine at school
  28. Further develop curriculum for THEA 141
  29. Make a container garden
  30. Read the Book of Mormon straight through, marathon style--This is on the calendar this week. I will use a combination of reading and listening via my scripture app.
  31. Read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance
  32. Read Brave New World
  33. Read I am the Messenger
  34. Write to Gramma at least once per month
  35. Sort through kids memorabilia--I did this several months ago and I've already got more stuff that needs to go in. This is a never ending project.
  36. Get my photo albums up to date--same for this one. Just when I get caught up I find more files that need to be printed and added. I happy to report that I am further ahead on this than I was when I made the goal and that's the whole point, right?!
  37. Place my photography for sale on Fine Art America --I'm undecided on following through on this one.
  38. Buy a piano (or keyboard with weighted keys)--Yep, got myself an old piano. Next goal--learn how to tune it!
  39. Pay off my student loan--Made my last payment in September!! What a relief it is to have that debt gone.
  40. Get my motorcycle endorsement--I want to do this but also don't want to. I waver between being brave and being a chicken. I am  not likely to have my endorsement by the end of the month because I am feeling like a chicken lately. Hopefully I can confront my fear, gather my courage, and go achieve this goal in the near future. 
Speaking of goals, fear and achievement. Today in church a woman went up to bear testimony and said something to the effect of, "The hardest part of doing something is starting." That got me thinking about starting things. As I thought of all the things I have wanted to do, decided to do, started to do, or stopped doing I was thinking that starting something was the easiest part of the equation. Starting is when action begins, where intellectual, emotional investment meets physical. Starting to cross-walk my board only took one step.  I had to lift a foot and when I did, viola!, I had started cross-walking my board! 

As she continued talking about whatever it was she was talking about I continued thinking about her statement. If starting wasn't the hard part well neither was wanting. Wanting to do something is even easier than starting. The list of goals I set for myself were things I wanted to do. I generally want a lot more than I can have, a lot more than I can do, and afford. Want seems to be something that kind of defines the human condition. We always want something better or something more. In some situations though, it may be hard to want something. For instance: it has taken me a lot of years to get to the point where I want to read the Book of Mormon marathon style. I've read it so many times now that I know the stories and the people and the concepts well and I guess now I want to read it all together to get a better idea of how it all fits together in a bigger picture kind of way. Bottom line: though occasionally I have to work my way into wanting something it is generally not hard at all to list a lot of things I want.

The testimony bearer had changed and I was still thinking about the hardest part of doing something and it seemed to me that the hardest part of doing something had to be in between wanting and starting. What's in between? Deciding? Actually making the mental commitment to do something, maybe that was it.  I had to mentally commit to lifting that foot while balancing on my surfboard. I wanted it before but not until I got myself in the mental place where I could trust my body and the wave and the board could I actually pick up my heel. Once the heel came up everything else followed. I'm mentally committed to reading the BoM this week too. I've prepared a plan and know how I'm going to carry it out. But deciding is a little different with the motorcycle endorsement. I want to do it but I haven't decided to do it yet. I haven't set a real date. I haven't done any of the background work. I haven't faced my fear of crashing.  I haven't found a bike I can practice on.  I haven't fully decided to do it because I haven't taken any mental action towards that goal. Same with putting my photography for sale on line. I want to do it.  I think it would be cool but I haven't committed any time, money, emotion to the cause. For me the hardest part of doing something is all mental, it is deciding I really want to do it, whether it is worth the risks and costs, whether I can face my fears, whether I can trust myself or others. Whether I really want it that bad. I think the hardest part of doing something is all in my head.

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