Thursday, May 19, 2011

Dear Friends,

Thank you so much for your kind words on the blog, on Facebook, by phone and in person.  Your offers of help and encouragement have been a lifeline reminding me that my Heavenly Father loves me and will carry me through all trials I may be asked to go through as I have faith in Him. You have been His hands on my behalf. I decided today that this is the third hardest week of my life. I've been reminding myself that I made it through those weeks so I can certainly make it through this one, He will provide a way.

Yesterday morning I got a note from my daughter's teacher.  He wanted to know if I could help him out with something today. It killed me to turn him down but I just couldn't do it.  I responded, "Besides the death in the family we also had a new baby born last night to my brother and his wife in Idaho, my husband moved to Hawaii last Friday, I am selling everything that we're not taking to Hawaii over the next two days, on Sunday the kids and I are moving out of our house and into an RV and on Monday the movers come to ship what we are taking with us to Hawaii." I just couldn't add one more thing to my list this week.

Though it made me sad I couldn't help but be relieved this week when I was released from my church calling as Counselor in the Relief Society, and to be "voted out" (I wasn't up for re-election for obvious reasons) of the office of PTA Treasurer. Every little bit of responsibility off my shoulders helps when I've got so much weighing on my mind but I will miss both a great deal.

I am really missing my husband. I talked with a friend, a military wife, about it. She made the following suggestions for coping:
"Identify the things you will enjoy about not having a husband around. I know this sounds ridiculous, but it's what I've done. Examples: There isn't anyone to impress with a clean house and timely meal or even personal grooming=you can relax and lower your standards to compensate. You can stay up late reading and it won't interrupt his sleep... go get some good books. What do you love to eat or cook that you don't usually because your husband doesn't like it? A certain kind of snack food? Take-out from an ethnic restaurant? Indulge while you can.I trained for a race with some friends, that was a distraction with great benefits."
These are great ideas that I will try to put into practice.  I like how she worded that first sentence "Identify the things you will enjoy about not having a husband around." Somehow it is much easier to think of those things when he is here though. :0)

Fortunately I have a super sister-in-law, Kris, here in town who has spent the past two days with me making sure I stay on track and helping me chip away at my list. Without her I would have probably stayed in bed yesterday. She brought me dinner on Tuesday and Thursday, Bridgette Hawes,  a PTA friend brought me dinner on Wednesday night and Susan Gehring, a lifelong buddy, has also been over helping and brought me a big Albertson's foot long sub that the kids used for lunches for two days. Yesterday morning my friend Andrea brought me a beautiful bouquet and a big hug and in the afternoon my friend Lisa gave my son several rides to and from activities. Last night the Rivards and Donovan Darrel came and toted away the chicken coop and chickens to install at the Rivards and they helped my brother in law, Ryan, (Dave's brother) fix a broken door handle on my suburban that I have to sell. While my brother in law was still here he made a list of projects that he is going to help me out with and Ron Hjelm, a contractor friend from church (who also put in our front window) came over to talk to him about the front door and garage doors that broke. Brother Watts and Brother Warczak, both from church, have also called this week to offer help with handyman work or anything else I might need. I am feeling very blessed and loved. Truly buoyed up by angels on earth.

I will be moved out by next Tuesday. The University's moving package includes movers. They will come in and do all the packing. Before they come I have to have everything out that won't be going to Hawaii so that it doesn't accidentally get packed. We will get charged if we go over our allotted weight and I have no intention of being charged,. I have been working on setting up a large garage sale for Saturday. I've got just about everything out to the garage and most of it is sorted and some is tagged. Today I have three PTA friends (Robin, MaryJo and Bridgette), my sister in law, Kris, and friend Susan coming over to help me finalize everything for the sale and make it look really nice.

I also got a surprise offer from another PTA friend, Shauna, yesterday, her Dad is a prospector (he buys storage units and the like and then resells for a profit) and she told him about my situation. He is coming over today to see if he would like to buy the whole garage sale. I already gave him a number and I drive a pretty hard bargain so we'll see what happens. I'm not counting on it working out but would be overjoyed if it did; it would make it possible for me to attend the Tomlinson's sealing in the Temple on Saturday.

Ella's funeral will be on Saturday in South Carolina.  There is no possible way for me to be there.  Even if I could I don't know that I would want to leave the kids right now. Going to the temple would give me a lot of peace and be a good substitute for the funeral I think. Perhaps it would help me focus on everything I have left to do.

I still have to pack our clothes and supplies that we will need to keep with us while the kids finish off the school year. I have a pile of items that need to be returned to the library, schools and to individuals so they don't accidentally end up garage saled or in Hawaii. I have a large pile of papers that need to be sorted through and copied, filed or destroyed as necessary. If this prospector doesn't purchase the sale I will need to put out signs, do advertising, clean up the driveway and tidy up the front yard for the garage sale. Lots to do.

Again, thank you for checking in on me. I appreciate your concern and look forward to getting back to posting some fun blog posts in the near future.

Love,
Dani

1 comment:

  1. Wow Dani Dooley - It's me, Genne Allen. I wish I knew that it was pouring at your house. I'm just sitting around this week feeling so terrible. May I help you with your yard sale tomorrow - or help with anything else? What time is your sealing? I'm great at driving a hard bargain. I would love to help - I'm sure you have a million offers, but I'm really free and it's just a little something. At the very least, I'm coming over tomorrow to buy a ton of stuff. Oh so much love your way...

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